BLESSED ART THOU MOTHER

Got this gem for Mother's Day yesterday. Thank you, Monty and Agnes.


BLESSED ART THOU MOTHER

Blessed art thou woman,
For thou shalt be called Mother.
Yea, and thy chores and thy tasks
Shall follow thee all the days
Of thy life.

And thou shalt eat the bread
Of thine own baking and
Thou shalt dwell forever in a
Dirty house if thou doest not choose
To clean it thyself.

Thou shalt arise before the cock
Croweth and thou shalt say unto
Thine self, “Where are the offspring
Which were given me? Yea, and the sun
Has risen high in the sky and the
Hour is getting late; wherefore, I
Have been long at my labors.”

And thou shalt go and find thy
Offspring prostrate on their cot.
And thou shalt say unto them, “Haste,
Arise and shine, for I have many labors for thee
To perform, wherefore, I have
Been many hours already preparing the way.”

And thine offspring shall linger in sleep
And shall say unto thee, “Thou didst
Not watch the late, late, late show
As I did last night and mine eyes are
Heavy and mine bones acheth.”

And thou shalt say unto thy offspring,
“Get thee up from thy cot
Ere I lay hand upon thee
And go ye hither and scrub a
Sparkling tub, for thou has left black rings upon
Its sides.”

And thy offspring shall say unto thee,
“I will go and do thy bidding, ….in a minute.”
And thy rage shall know no end
And thou shalt weep and wail
And gnash thy teeth mightily.

Nevertheless; thou shalt scrub
A sparkling tub thyself and glory
Shall be added unto thee, for thou didst
Not strike the lazy beast.

Thou art blessed above all others
And thy descendants shall call thee
Blessed, for thou prepares a table before them.
Thou cookest meat and all manner of
Tasty vittles, and they shall sit at the
Table with thee and partake with thee.

And they shall add glory to thy crown
For they shall let thee also wash the
Dishes, if thou wilt.
And when the night falleth, thou shalt be pooped.
And thy offspring shall say of thee,
“She is an old woman wherefore
She neither goes dancing, nor does she
Watch the late, late, late show.”

Thy art and thy craft shall make thee
Called on and thou shalt labor at
Many tasks in the kingdom for whosoever
Asketh, thou do his bidding.

Thy back shall acheth with arthritis
Thy cane and thy husband
Shall be thy support.
Thy veins shall be varicose
In thy aching legs but thou shalt
Do thy labor with a smile, neither
Shalt thou gripe for in the day
That thou doest, thy name shall be mud.

Nevertheless, thou art blessed for
Thou art crowned with the angels
On the second Sunday of May on each
And every year.

Wherefore thou shalt be blessed above
All others for thou art Mother
And thou shalt find peace and joy in
Thy offspring forever and ever,
If thou endureth to the end!

Our New Puppy

This is Hank.

Hank is 7 weeks old. The kids named him after Hank the Cow Dog. He is part German Shepherd and part travelling sales dog. He came to live at our house this week. He is a little timid, but also very smart.

Ann is not too sure what to think about her "little brother". Hank certainly likes Ann. He tries so hard to get her to play. She doesn't seem too interested.

The kids like him. Joseph wants Hank to sleep in his bed. Elizabeth likes to play follow the leader with Hank. He will follow her everywhere. Jacob liked the puppy until the puppy started washing his face. Hank was a little sad his first couple of days. Daniel sat with him until he felt more comfortable. Even Dad likes Hank.

Out of the Box

Facebook has a lot of quizzes. They are silly, somewhat fun and embarrassingly addictive. I've taken way too many quizzes. I now know that I am an existential, moderately liberal, pheglmatic hobbit. Who knew?

These personality defining quizzes are interesting. I don't put that much faith in the accuracy of the results. However, I do spend a lot of time trying to figure myself out. There is something comforting in knowing parameters. I know the limits. I know how to work within my little box.

On the other hand, nobody likes to be labeled. Confined to one view. The security of the boundaries sometimes give way. There is freedom. I break free from others expectations. I redefine my edges as I learn more. I learn more about myself, about others, about life.

I Never....

"I will never live in Dallas."
I've lived in Dallas for about 13 years and loved it.

"I will never get married." and/or "I will never get married before 30."
Kermit and I have been married 13 years. It's not a very long time. I just can't imagine where I'd be without him. Oh. I was 26 when I got married.

"I'm a city girl. I'll never live in the country."
Oh boy. Where do I start on that one? Not only do I live in the country and love it, I own chickens.

"I'll never drive a Suburban."
Just bought a charcoal grey Suburban. I am officially a SUV-driving soccer mom.

The point is, never say never. Wait a minute. I just said "never". Hmmm. not sure how to get around that. Maybe it should be "never say never about the silly things."

Wildflowers

I love this picture of Jacob in the Indian paintbrushes. I love that I have so many beautiful wildflowers growing on our property. I'd like to see even more. This year I'll spread some bluebonnet seed. Jacob did like checking out the flowers. He just likes to be outside. He has learned to open the screendoor on his own. I've caught him outside unsupervised more than once. If Ann is anxious to go outside, I know that a small child is already out.

We spent a lot of time in the yard today. Joseph helped move some trees that got ran over. Hannah stacked wood. Jacob dug in the dirt. Sarah terrorized Jacob. It was a good day.

Life's Too Short For Uncomfortable Shoes

On Easter Sunday, little girls all over put on their lovely new dresses and shiny new shoes. Hair brushed and faces washed they march off to church. This morning Sarah put on her soft pink dress with the smocking and the ribbon roses. Her hair is brushed. Her face is washed. It is time to go and she gets her pink boots. Pink snow boots with a lovely pink Easter dress. I'm not sure if they were the first pair she had. Or maybe she was matching her shoes to her dress. I think they were just comfortable. They are soft and warm and cozy. They are easy to put on. They are water repellant.

I put on high heels. They looked fine with my outfit. They had a chunky not-too-high heel. Nice neutral color. They were not painful to wear. I've owned some shoes that looked fabulous, but were torture to wear. To get back to the point. My shoes were not bad, but neither were they great. I found myself wishing for my fuzzy slippers or bare feet or Sarah's boots.

Shoes are not my favorite thing. I don't like shopping for shoes. I don't like trying to get the right shoe for the right outfit. I don't really like wearing shoes unless I really have to. That is not to say that I hate shoes. I've found some that I love. Once I tried on a pair of knee-high high-heeled red leather boots. Wow. Those were awesome. Unfortunately, the budget did not allow it at that time. I still regret not getting those boots.

Friendly Visit

My friend, my lovely, wonderful, fabulous friend is coming to visit tomorrow. I don't get to see her as often as I like, so her arrival will be greeted with much joy. The kids absolutely adore her. She has been like a Pied Piper to them. There will be a flurry of activity as they each compete to get more of her attention. At some point, if we are fortunate, they will go do their own thing. If they cannot decide to go of their own accord, I will stronly urge them to find a new distraction. And then it will be my turn to try to bring as much joy to my friend as she brings to me. Everyone should have a friend like mine. She is optimistic, generous, loving, and funny. She never makes her bed and her house is just as cluttered as mine. I think she owns a watch. However, it doesn't really coincide with the rest of the world. I always tell her a 30-45 minute earlier start time if I want her to be on time. She listens with all her attention. She is fiercely loyal. Yes. Everyone should have a friend like mine. I consider myself very fortunate to have one such as her.